New Offshore Radio Station To Be Totally Based On Land

3/9/2026

A new UN-seaworthy boat has been looked at and an very cheeky offer made, so that it can been taken 3 miles off of Felixstowe where it will sink. The secret project has a 200 point business plan that will ensure large companies will part with their share holders money without any audit trail whatsoever.

The boat itself will not be a radio station but rather an offshore cafe with the unique selling point that it is totally submerged. A spokesman has told us they originally planned to buy the pictured vessel, but their backers warned it would need to be inshore and might turn out as a profitable venture, something that offshore radio cannot be these days.

The plan includes a tape recorder and the original Radio Sutch studio where badly recorded programs will then be broadcast on the National DAB network, but only in Felixstowe, which is well known for it's bustling wealth. A local Kebab House has already been signed up to sponsor a weekly sixties and seventies show, which although being a saturated market, has never done home deliveries up to 11pm before, an angle they feel strongly will make tens of thousands in profit (Zimbabwe dollars cited).

12 Comments

Just when we thought Mike had given up on the project -

4/9/2026 12:22:31 am

he floats another white lotus

Ray Sanderson

4/9/2026 12:29:08 am

Whether this exciting memorial to the pirate radio spatula home of Frankton on Sea comes to fruition or not you can bet I'll be there to pick up the pieces of eight to develop pan European community radio at the end of my pier

Peter EEEEEEE

4/9/2026 12:33:13 am

Has Radio Zealand finished then?

Kevin The Apollo Duck teenager from 1966

4/9/2026 01:04:14 am

I'm sorry I'm just not getting enough attention here

It's so unfair. No one ordinary listens to my quacking out Quakers Oats schemes

Peter Moore the MoD father endorses my swims in long and erudite essays of critical praise

Every other ugly anorak swan says I am Quakers

Will it help if I come clean about another of my medical conditions

Paul G Lucas, 52, has revealed that he's been living with a neurodevelopmental condition for his entire life, but hasn't spoken about it in public until now.

The Little Frinton star told Romesh Ranganathan on BBC Radio 2: “I’ve never, ever spoken about this publicly, but I’m autistic, and so I enjoy periods of being very sociable, like you are in the theatre, and then I also enjoy those periods of solitude where I can just write on my own.”

Stew Admin: How Brave of you Paul. Just like Dolly Parton these days

Peter Moore; Thank you for sharing: I have problems chewing these days

Gary Stevens; Thunk You Paul. I have problems with everting these days

Peter e

4/9/2026 09:50:12 am

I have already ssnt them a playlist and they have totally ignored me, like the fascist pigs they clearly are so I will not be listening to the broadcast ever, ever, ever...

why am I always so angry?

Fred Bramley

4/9/2026 09:52:29 am

DAB in Felixstowe. 1.1 khz
National Cheese Grater average 1.8 khz
So this will not reach into Mexico City SDR
I now need to go to the toilet

Mains Drainage - ask Pontoon Marsh offshore Industries

5/9/2026 08:16:50 pm

BBC

Political editor
Published
6 hours ago
"It makes us look a bit like a pirate ship," a senior Reform figure acknowledges privately, deeply frustrated that after a year in which they say the party has "radically professionalised" the events of the last few days could still happen.

It was the recurring conversation throughout Reform UK's conference in Birmingham: the consequences of the undercover filming broadcast by Channel 4 News which has cost two senior party figures their jobs, at least for now.

How much damage does it cause to Reform? And what does it tell us about them?

"A key part of the appeal of us is the sense of us being cavaliers. Doing things differently. Standing out. And that's great. We have roundheads too. Those who ask the boring questions. Do the checks. We need more of them," this same senior figure adds.

The story of Reform over the last 12 months can be summarised in three words: defections, elections and money.

Sherlock Bright Homes Jnr

6/9/2026 08:31:43 pm

Clue N1: WE is so far identified as Paul G talking AI P

HUGE GINORMOUS CLUE NO 2 MR WATSON: Paul Rustler has never heard of THEM or been offered preferential shares and a seat on the board for his expertise

Clueless Numbers: Bakers dozens on radio boards of a certain age who play along with this sort of thing every now and again laughing into their 40kg solar panels and doing some real heavy lifting radio work

Forget about the Felixstowe project

8/9/2026 04:26:06 pm

Consider it done your Highness

Forget about the past

16/9/2026 06:57:27 pm

Radio London,·
04 Apr 2026,·
16 mins
Slumlord: The murky world of Peter Rachman
London Uncovered

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Peter Rachman dominated housing in post-war London - he owned vast swathes in the west of the city, accumulating huge wealth as his tenants lived in squalor and fear of his hard-nosed collectors and enforcers. He was also at the heart of the city's murky, post-war underworld.

In Slumlord, Neil Root pulls back the curtain on this seedy world to paint a portrait of a fascinating man whose path intersected with figures as diverse as Christine Keeler, the glamorous society girl at the heart of the Profumo Scandal, and Michael X, the Black Power activist who later went on to be hanged for double murder.

(Image credit: Icon Books)

Programme Website
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The Loving Awareness wrist band plays on while Tories and Reform Burn

24/9/2026 02:13:48 am

Present a Back to Work card?

Yellow stars and pink triangles not good enough now?

I see we will never see a Tory / Reform government for a long time yet

Is this country completely F'D??

"This reduced rate would be paid onto a "Back to Work" card, which would not allow cash withdrawals or spending on these items."

It's the cashless Big Brother society folks

Cashew nuts for brains politicians

Lonely Fans of Sergeant Hearts

24/9/2026 04:14:25 am

Hi all my only fans, I know I am hogging the board with the blog of the last word as usual. But this one is too too good not to let pass by

Comments from the sindie newpaper about this silly story today

LuckyLuckyLi
2 hrs ago
Why don't they stop oppressing people on benefits and create more jobs? It is the same old crappy rhetoric with these politicians "If you vote for me I will take away people's benefits". Kemi Bad Enough, PEOPLE DO NOT CHOOSE NOT TO WORK, PEOPLE CANNOT GET WORK! Get that through your thick skull!

1) Why doesn't she question why employers choose not to reply to people who have applied for jobs or offer them an interview.

2) Nobody who is on benefits can afford to spend money on alcohol. Where is she getting this stupid information.

{NOW I AM STAYING TOTALLY QUIET ON THAT ONE!!!]

3) No one earns more from benefits then someone in a job. What planet is she from?

4) AI is going to take more people's jobs, what does she intend to do about that? has she even addressed it in her policies? NOPE!

I think that it is time for a lot of changes including political changes to MPs salaries, performance and how they serve the public because the bag of old tricks are wearing really thin!

5) And finally stop wasting money of these stupid quango's such as Restart that do not help people apart from themselves { SOME OF US HAVE NOTICED THAT DEAR} and stop giving money to the Ukraine that's why England has no money! IT'S NOT THE BENEFIT CLAIMANT'S FAULT!

Comment by Trynottolie.

Trynottolie
2 hrs ago
The Cons could lead by example and be paid on a card that doesn't allow buying prostitutes,cocaine etc.

Comment by Markoscar.

Markoscar
2 hrs ago
The tories become more pathetic and vile with every passing week. Is there some kind of competition amongst the right-wing to see who can be the most performative cruel and stupid?

reply

24 Sept 2026 at 3:16am
This is a good laugh

This is Ethero really saying what is expected from a warehouse operative

"Education Level: Some Secondary School Coursework"

Eat your art out Van Guard!

Industry Sector: Transport, Logistics
Job Type: Temporary - Full Time
Salary in GBP (£): 12.71 - 12.71, Hourly Rate

Job Location: Stoke-on-Trent, Staffordshire, West Midlands, UK

Education Level: Some Secondary School Coursework

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New Offshore Radio Station To Be Totally Based On Land

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